Notes from Chuck Obremski’s sermon 8/14/05
Mark 10:45

1. The Two Possibilities
A. The Offender
B. The Offended

2. The Offender (Matthew 5:23-24)
A. Stop
B. Go
C. Reconcile
D. Return

3. The Offended (Matthew 18:21-35)
A. Recognize – that we will have an unlimited number of opportunities to forgive others. (Matthew 18:21-22)

B. Realized – that forgiving is possible only as a response to the grace of God. (Matthew 18:27)

C. Resist – the temptation to be hypocritical. (Matthew 18:28-30)

D. Refusal – to forgive will have severe consequences . (Matthew 18:34-35)

Not difficult to offend. Francis Schaeffer said that people naturally want to boss others around. One does not automatically abandon this mentality when he becomes a Christian. Our greatest battle is not one with God…Jesus took care of that. But our greatest battle is with each other.

Mark 10:45 – “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

This will change your life if you understand the principal.

Forgiveness is not optional for Christians. What is the number one way to resolve conflict? Forgiveness. Both to give and receive it. Misunderstanding or miscommunication…sometimes it is unknown by us that we have hurt someone, that we caused offense. We don’t recognize it or realize it. Communication is so important, listening to words and what was said.

Inability to forgive destroys any relationship. It will effect the body of Christ. We will hurt one another intentionally or unintentionally. Don’t assess motives to one another. Forgiveness is the oil of relationships. It reduces friction. Horizontal forgiveness between people. God’s forgiveness of us makes it possible for us to forgive others.

Ephesians 4:29-32 – No unwholesome words…only that which is edifying.

Two possibilities:
1) The Offender – sometimes on purpose
2) The Offended

Sometimes we may not be aware of how we offended. When offended, we may reply, “if you don’t know by now…I’m not going to tell you.”

God’s word brings clarity when we are confused. Matthew 5:23-24

Offender – what are we suppose to do when we realize it? Stop everything we are doing…stop pretending. Take a good hard look at what God is tugging at to get our attention. Stop pretending that it will go away. You are to go and take care of it.

We should not be like Peter when he questioned about John, “What about that guy?” Don’t be concerned about him…be concerned about yourself. Be concerned about God. Differences should be addressed face to face, if possible. Don’t e-mail…leave out the confusion of misinterpretation. No matter what, just go!

Be reconciled. Do not be angry. It brings about a change of heart. The goal…is peace among the brethren. It’s important to be able to disagree, agreeably.

Return…come again to serve the Lords, present your offering. Nothing will hold us like unfinished business.

Servant – requires humility. It also requires humility to forgive. I’m responsible to that which is right before God. You are then freed up to move forward with the Lord once you take those actions. Certain injuries take a while to heal up.

What if you’ve been offended? Matthew 18:21-35

When you’ve been offended…there are times when you just need to get over it. Stop whining and crying…get over it. Remember…the world doesn’t revolved around us. It’s not all about you…there’s a bigger picture. What is it that is in the best interest of everyone? We are to consider one another as more important than ourselves. Have the best interest of others at heart. Do I have to have my way all the time? Do I have the attitude that it’s all about me?

The Offended…there are an unlimited number of times we will have for forgive one another. Peter asked the question…how many times do I have to forgive? We are always looking for an out. We have an unlimited number of times to forgive because you have an unlimited number of times you will cause offense.

Colossians 2:13-14 – Our transgressions were nailed to the cross. Without that vertical forgiveness…we would not have the ability to forgive others. Have you been broken yet? We are able to forgive others only as a response to the grace of God. Resist the temptation to be a hypocrite. The reason we don’t forgive is because we are unwilling. We have the capacity to forgive. We don’t because we are unwilling.

Relationships that you thought were dead can be mended…made alive again. When you don’t forgive…you pay a heavy price. Unforgiveness is like self strangulation.

Chuck then told the story about Johnny and Sally…playing in the barn yard. Johnny killed the duck accidentally with the sling shot…and Sally saw it. She held it over his head repeatedly, manipulating Johnny into doing all sorts of work for her. Until one day when Johnny could stand it no longer, he confessed to killing the duck to his grandma. Grandma told Johnny that she had seen him kill the duck when it happened. She wanted to know how long he would let Sally hold it over his head before he asked for forgiveness. She had forgiven him the day it happened. But he didn’t take hold of that forgiveness until he confessed and asked for forgiveness.

How long will let you your Sally, AKA unforgiveness, make you a slave?

God too has been standing at the window and saw it all…and forgiven.