Of Little Worth

You haven’t thought about me for years now,
Have you, little girl?
For years I dominated your life,
Made you feel worthless, like nothing,
Even wanting to die.

Then you accepted Christ,
Sixteen years ago.
And He began to heal your wounds.
You thought of me less and less,
Until finally years would go by with nary a thought.

You learned to let go,
Forgive…even when you didn’t understand,
Made your life about your present,
Trusting God,
For eternal security and a place in heaven.

You’ve worked diligently to prove yourself,
To feel like something of worth,
Then tonight I slipped in,
Just a thought,
A reminder of your past.

Will I lure you once again,
Into darkness and depression?
Or will you renew your mind,
In Christ Jesus,
Mindful that you are a new creation in Him?

Before…I had you in my hand.
Then Christ Jesus freed you…
From all your past.
That’s when I declared war,
After all…I’m the enemy of your soul.

Will you follow your feelings?
Or believe God’s word,
And His power within?
Sure your salvation is secure,
But your present is being worked out.

I urge you to follow the easy path of emotions.
Dare not trust God for a miracle.
It’s been forty-eight years that you’ve waited,
Need I remind…you’re no Abraham and Sarah,
Nor David victorious over Goliath.

Yet you believe that God has given you a promise,
Assurance that He sees you,
And will act in His perfect timing.
Just as He heard the cries Hannah and Ruth,
Did He hear you too?

Decisions…decisions little girl,
Which will it be?
I still whisper loudly that you are of little worth,
Yet He’s promised to never leave you, nor forsake you,
Even to work all things together for good.

So Susan…your future is hanging in the balance.
Will you have faith, believe and even trust Him,
For that which is yet unseen?
Or will I continue to blind you,
To that which your God can do in, through and for you?

By Susan Bunts
October 31, 2007

Tonight a memory from the past came hurling back to assault me…out of the blue. Something I hadn’t thought about in years. It didn’t take long… for those feelings of that wretched time to return.

But I just hate letting the bad guy win. Even when I watch a movie…I root for the good guy and good to triumph over evil. So even though I’m tempted to given in and follow that well worn easy path and believe my feelings…I don’t want to let Satan win. I want to see him defeated…go down hard in flaming, visible defeat.

This last weekend…I felt like God got a hold of me. Grabbed my by the lapels…and shook me…and said, “Girl…I can change your situation in a moment. Are you going to trust Me or not?”

Whenever there is a moment of a spiritual high…you can be sure that the enemy wants engage in a well timed…very personal attack…and indeed he has done that in recent days.

Yet…I desire to believe God. I want to trust Him and know with confidence that He will deliver me. To quote Beth Moore, “I’m believing God!”

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