If you had told me this morning, that tonight I’d be reaching to someone whom I hadn’t talked to in over two years…I would have told you, “You’re just plain wrong!” But in fact, it is I who would have been wrong.
You know how God has a habit of chipping away at things in our lives. Sometimes…He does it in one fell swoop…and a whole big chunk is gone. Other times…He does it bit by bit…until finally I’m being conformed into the image and likeness of His Son. That chipping away can be painful…especially when the chip that falls away feels more like a piece of my body as He works on my heart and mind…or even a wrong attitude.
Did I have a wrong attitude regarding this person? Maybe? Perhaps a little pride…and a whole lot of hurt thrown into the mix.
The last two years of my life were very difficult. A time…where God whacked off big whole chunks all at once. Chunks…that when I found them missing made me feel quite unstable, uncertain and unhappy.
Of the pieces that were missing…one was my friend. One in whom I took much delight. But as circumstances would have it…just when I needed him the most…he pulled back. That pulling back caused a boat load of hurt in the middle of some very turbulent seas. But God has a way…doesn’t He? He likes to get me in a place…where I have no place to turn but to Him. He had a plan and purpose for allowing what happened.
When I’m the middle of circumstances that seem so uncertain…there is no way I can have perspective and understand what God is doing. I’m not sure I fully understand even now. But at least now I have some distance…and perspective and can see God’s hand in the middle of my mess.
Even with that perspective…I wasn’t overly receptive when God first prompted me to call…to reach out to this friend who has been MIA from my life. I rationalize with God, “I’m sure he would have taken my call…if I called him. But God, he hasn’t called me in over two years…doesn’t that tell me everything I need to know?”
I should have known the answer to that…because in God’s economy…what someone else does or doesn’t do…isn’t an excuse for not obeying God’s direction. But God was gentle…and gave me more time to “work it through”.
But today was the day for obedience when He gave me a couple of promptings…that were too hard even for me to miss. When I heard what was going on in my wayward friend’s life I thought…I really should call or send an email. Reach out. But then I dismissed that prompting. That is…until I got home this evening.
In my in-basket was an email from my friend and author Krista Beth Driver. She had sent an email updating people about what had happened to one of her beloved horses, Misty. Tragically Misty had colic…something quite deadly to horses. This poor horse that had once been abandoned by her owner was rescued by Krista Beth. Once deserted, now greatly loved and well cared for…she was now gone. At her passing the other horses Bo, a blind gelding, and Grace were missing their friend Misty. As Krista told of events from the past week…she applied the lesson learned…from her own emotions and watching these beautiful animals…to friendship. She asked some penetrating questions about what kind of friends we are. Do we come alongside, encourage or challenge our friends?
“Okay God…I get it. You want me to reach out. Alright…I’ll send an email. As I wrote it…I discovered that God had mended…and healed some hurt that remained in my heart. I found that more than wanting to be justified in my hurt…I valued our friendship more. “That indeed it is water under the bridge. Today is a new today…and I value you and miss you. I miss your sparkling blue eyes…and the way you make me laugh. I miss your passion for people and for doing the right thing.”
After re-reading and proofing my letter several times…I hit the send button.
I don’t know how it will be responded to…if at all? I might come away disappointed and a little bit hurt. Or I could have my socks knocked off and have a friendship restored. I don’t know. But I do know this…God called me to obey His direction and reach out. To say I love you and care about you…and miss you. And indeed I do. If I get no response…or find the friendship is just dead…well I guest that’s something I need to take to Jesus.
More and more…with so much of life…I’m find that the looser I cling…and the less expectations I bring to the table…the better. I love the Steve Curtis Chapman song, “Hold on to Jesus”. There is one lyric that holds a truth I need to keep reminding myself about. “Cling loosely to things that are fleeting and hold on to Jesus for life.”
Sometimes the things that are fleeting are people. When that happens…my grip on Jesus must grow tighter.
So is there anyone God is prompting you to reach out to? In reading this…does their face come to your mind? Obedience to God’s direction is always the right answer. What will it take to bring you to the point of obedience?
To learn more about Krista Beth Driver’s work with children and neglected and abused horses please go to the Serenity Center for Change.
Hold on to Jesus
by Steven Curtis Chapman
I have come to this ocean
And the waves of fear are starting to grow
The doubts and questions are rising with the tide
So I’m clinging to the one sure thing I know
I will hold on to the hand of my Savior
And I will hold on with all my might
I will hold loosely to things that are fleeting
And hold on to Jesus
I will hold on to Jesus for life
I’ve tried to hold many treasures
They just keep slipping through my fingers like sand
But there’s one treasure that means more than breath itself
So I’m clinging to it with everything I am
Like a child holding on to a promise
I will cling to His word and believe
As I press on to take hold of that
for which Christ Jesus took hold of me
Hold on for life