The Dreaded Colonoscopy Day

This was something that I had managed to put off for 6 years past the recommended time of age 50.  Yes…today was the dreaded colonoscopy day!  If it weren’t for a persistent husband and doctor, I hoped to go to the grave without experiencing it.

My anxiety level and dread were high and were somewhat abated by the fact I had a doctor I felt comfortable with and I knew my husband would be there for me…which he was.  Thank you Chris!

In my anxiety I searched a lot of websites to read up on what people experienced so that I would have an idea on what I was facing.  Of course everyone’s experience is different, so I took what I read with a grain of salt.  There were some pretty entertaining blog posts about colonoscopies, if that can be considered entertaining.

The worst part of the whole thing was drinking that wretched swill called Suprep.  It’s downright nasty.  Something invented by a wicked ugly person who should be slapped.  Even though I experienced the unlovely effects, they were expected.  Why in the world can’t some develop a colonoscopy prep that tastes good?  If they did, they would make a mint and retire early.  The yucky syrupy was made even more intolerable by adding 10 ounces of water to extend my experience of the disgusting taste.  Uhhhhhhhhhh!

Then I had the expected effects…which all things considered are not too bad.  If you’ve ever had a bad case of the stomach flu…you’ve been there.  I was on the frequent flyer program with my toilet.  Stay close by and for goodness sake don’t go anywhere during that time.  Once the Suprep had done its job I was feeling better, albeit a little weaker.

But as I dozed off for the night…I knew what’s coming in the morning.  Round two of Suprep, made even worse because I knew how awful the stuff tastes.  The first time I tried using a straw to bypass my taste buds…didn’t work for me.  I tried using cold water but no matter which way you slice it…it’s nauseating.  Literally nauseating!  If you can keep it down you are doing good.

The two additional 16 ounce glasses of water are hard to get down.  I felt waterlogged.  Thankfully once the medicine kicked in my tummy was feeling better.

Learn from my mistake and schedule your colonoscopy early in the day.  I scheduled my appointment for 12:30 pm.  Not good!  That made it about 40 hours of drinking clear fluids, eating some lemon Jell-O with some wretched Suprep and massive amounts of water thrown in.  But I’ve got to say the clear fluids and Jell-O make the ugly part easier as does eating light the day before.

Though I was feeling a bit tired and nervous, the colonoscopy itself was easy.  Today I met my met new best friend…the anesthesiologist!  Thanks to him I remember nothing of my colonoscopy time!

The place I went, Lone Star Endoscopy Center, was great as was Dr. Karen Steffer.  The people at the center and my doctor were very nice and make an unpleasant test not so bad.  Now if only they could do something about the Suprep!

The good thing about being adopted is that I don’t have information to put down for family medical history.  My standard answer is Unknown/Adopted.  The bad part is I don’t have a clue what’s floating around in my gene pool.

Thankfully today’s test came up clear, no polyps or concerns were found.  I got a clean bill of colon health.  Thank You Lord!  I got a ten year pass before the next colonoscopy.  I am in prayer that the rapture of the church will come long before then.

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