Letter to My Niece…The Adventure Begins


Dear one…now that the good news of your engagement has gotten out I’m sure that at times you feel overwhelmed. Well hold on to your hat…it’s just beginning. But never fear…these waters you will soon learn to navigate with skill.

Who would have thought that after you decide to marry you’d have so decisions make? As many decisions as you and your fiancé will be making in the coming months…it doesn’t hold a candle to the all the advice you will receive from well meaning family, friends and even a few strangers. Even this you will learn to handle with grace and ease.

There is so much joy when the wonderful news of an engagement is announced. Before long…decisions and planning will start.

For my husband Chris and me…those decisions started right away with shopping for an engagement ring. Because we had only known each other 3 months, Chris decided that it would be best for us to go ring shopping together. That experience was a mixture of comedy and frustration. In the end…it turned out to be good practice for the other elements of our wedding that we would have to plan.

We started engagement ring shopping at Robbins Brothers. It was kind of funny. We still felt the magic of being newly engaged. But we dealt with a clerk who was used to selling to young people who didn’t really know what they wanted. But I was 49 years old…and had an opinion on just about everything…and wasn’t too keen on explaining myself every time I said no. While I couldn’t tell you exactly what I wanted in a ring…I knew it when I saw it. After repeatedly being quizzed if I like this ring or that one…and why…we decided that perhaps we should look at some other stores.

That turned out to be wise and providential decision. God led us to a jewelry store…where with no pressure browsing we found an engagement ring and our wedding rings. I also learned…that I don’t have to worry that I’m hurting the sales person’s feeling when I say “No, that’s not what I want.”

Some of the first decisions you and your fiancé will need to make will include when you are getting married and what’s your budget. Both answers will drive the other decisions you need to make while planning your wedding.

Because we decided to get married relatively soon…we had a lot of decisions to make in a short period of time. That necessitated…making decisions quickly. Because we were paying for the wedding ourselves…and not our parents our budget wasn’t extravagant. While we wanted to have a nice wedding…we didn’t want to break the bank on that one day.

We wanted a ceremony that would honor and glorify God. One where we could praise and thank God for bringing us together. One that we could invite family and friends to and have the gospel message shared…even in our wedding ceremony.

We both knew where we wanted the ceremony to be held…Kindred Community Church. Kindred had been my church home since we became a church. It was the place where Chris and I first met. But we had a decision to make. Should we hold the ceremony in the church sanctuary…or in one of the lovely garden areas? The garden areas were less expensive and would have easily accommodated the number of guests we wanted to invite. But my heart and soul were in the sanctuary because I have so many fond memories in there. It was just right for us.

Once those important, driving decisions were made…when, how much and where…we had to get busy. We had a wedding fast approaching in four months and counting.

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“So, what are you doing on Saturday?”

“So, what are you doing on Saturday?”, Chris asked.

Trust me…if I had known what was following that question…I’d have wrapped up my answer right quick and said, “Not much, why…what did you want to do?”

But instead I was blissfully ignorant as to what Chris wanted to do. So I droned on and on that I needed to go to Washington Mutual to take proof that my mother had died…and get their help wrapping up her affairs. While it’s been one month since she died…there are still a lot of details to work out.

But Chris waited patiently until I stopped talking. I’m not even sure what happened next…if I asked him what he wanted to do…or if he just said it. I guess I should have suspected something because this was the second day in a row that Chris asked about Saturday.

Chris volunteered, “Well…I had something in mind that I’d like us to do.”

I’m thinking maybe it’s the hot air balloon ride that he talked about recently. Maybe he’s made arrangements for us to go out to celebrate our third month anniversary. Three months…but I keep looking at the calendar and I’m certain…it must be three years…or has it been ten or twenty years? Surely we can’t have only known each other for only three months now could we?

“I’d like for us to go shopping for an engagement ring.” When Chris saw the quizzical look on my face…he realized he needed to explain further. “Susan Harriett Bunts, will you be my bride?”

Holy smokes…this is something I’ve been waiting for, for my entire life. Something I’ve dreamed about…but never really let myself believe would happen…just in case God had a different plan. But those words had actually been spoken…and not on some movie screen…and it wasn’t someone recounting their wonderful engagement story. But instead Chris Wachtel was actually proposing to me! Holy Mackanole!!! Imagine that. Wow God…You truly are the best Matchmaker. Wow!

I’m sure my jaw dropped open and just plain stayed there. That is in between the “Wows” and the “Are you’re serious?” Finally when I realized…that Chris wasn’t just yanking my chain…I figured that I’d better seal the deal with an emphatic, “Yes”! “Yes Chris, I’d love to marry you. I love you so much!”

I’m not sure how many times I said “Wow” or how many times I asked if Chris if he was serious before I realized…this is the real deal. This man…whom I have come to love so deeply in so short a time…has actually asked me to marry him. And I said, “Yes!”

I cautioned Chris that this is going to be for life…till death do us part. He’s got two options to get out of our marriage…death or the rapture. I feel like I’ve won the lottery…got the grand prize. I reminded Chris that my flaws far out weigh any good attributes…but that didn’t seem to act as a deterrent. Instead he felt the same certitude that I do about him. This is the right thing and the right time.

We are so excited to see what God is going to do in and through us. We both want to have God at the center of our relationship and use it to bring Him praise, glory and honor.

Chris and I are very much aware of what a miracle God has already done in bringing us together. Two broken people…so unworthy. Unworthy of God, His salvation and unworthy of each other and the love we have for one another. But we serve a big God. One who is bigger still. Our problems, flaws, hurts, pain and the baggage that we will both bring to our marriage…are out shadowed by our God.

To the many people who I shamelessly and repeatedly asked to pray that God would bring me a husband…I thank you. You are many…because while I was ready to accept God’s will…I didn’t want to get to heaven only to find out that I didn’t have it because I didn’t ask for it.

To Michael Paddison…the man that God used to bring Chris and me together…we are eternally grateful. Thank goodness that you had eyes to see that which we could not see. You were right.

While we don’t have a date set yet…and the details we will need to work out are plentiful…I don’t want to miss the marriage because of the engagement period or wedding. I am so looking forward to our marriage Chris and the road we will take to get there…and the path God will lead us on.

Chris…you are the love of my life. I don’t want to miss one day without you.

Thank You Jesus!

Fiancée, engaged, married, wedding, wife…those are some words I never expected to hear associated with me. Thank you Chris for making my life long dream come true. I’m glad that dream is coming true with you.